So I started the clomid, a low dose fertility drug that should bring on ovulation. We are doing everything that we have to do, following Dr orders. And I think I was ovulating. but who knows. I was extremely emotional and had signs and symptoms of ovulation, so now we have the 2 week waiting game to see what happens.
2 weeks.
2 weeks, in theory you dont think it is a long time, but when you are waiting and watching the clock & calendar, time seems to drag. I am trying to be patient, I think that's what I was supposed to learn through all of this. Being patient, waiting on the LORD. So even though we are supposed to be waiting, I did ask the dr for fertility drugs, my body seems to fail me on this. Its all in Gods hands anyway. I dont see why fertility drugs wont just give me that extra boost, if it isn't meant to be, it wont be.
And now we wait. If this doesn't happen I dont know how much more I can go through, There is so much stress and timing, and taking the right meds, watching waiting, counting, checking, planned intercourse isn't nearly as fun as it sounds. Being emotional, i put my body through a lot. Physically, mentally, emotionally. I get my hopes up and get excited.... so I dont know how many cycles of this we will go through...
and then if i do get pregnant I will have anxiety and fears of yet another loss.... threes strikes and I am out.
I had 2 losses already a 3rd would break me even more and definitely have me questioning whether or not we were suppose to have more kids.
So thats where I am, waiting, praying, waiting, praying
